31 May, 2013


My brother-in-law sent me this.
Thought I'd share.

Bozone is my favorite.
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people
 that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, 
unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in
the near future.

Although Arachnoleptic fit is a close second.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed 
just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

The Washington Post has published the winning submissions
 to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked
 to supply alternative meanings for common words.

The winners are:
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight 
you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a 
flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), a condition in which you 
absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavoured mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up
 after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing 
adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.), person who sprinkles his conversation
 with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The 
belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the 
roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), opening in the front of boxer shorts 
worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers 
to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, 
subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply
a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people 
that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,
 unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in
the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for 
the purpose of getting laid.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which rend-
ers the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit
 and the person who doesn't get it.
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are
 running late.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (that one got
 extra credit)
9. Karmageddon (n): Its like, when everybody is sending off
all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth 
explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through
 the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem 
smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just 
after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets
 into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a
 grub in the fruit you're eating.
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an a**hole

29 May, 2013

I See The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Pencil girl gave up hoeing strawberries on Memorial Day to come over and help me focus.

This weekend, I came across a blog post about how to fold fabric***.

Proper ways to fold fabric?

It turns out there are. Multiple ways. Silly ways. Elaborate ways.

This one made practical sense to me: Fold fabric around your 6" wide quilt/cutting ruler. Flip in half. Place on stack.
I think I could keep this up.

( no smirking) .

Eleven drawers are filled.
With sewing notions.
Knitting/crochet hoops and needles and hooks in this drawer.

Amazingly, some boxes came OUT of the closet and were dispersed to better locations.

----With pencil girl cracking the whip.

Still work to do.

I met my new boss on Saturday. First impression was an A+.

This is scary as in, "Is he really this nice?"
Waiting for the shoe to drop....

{I do have some trust issues with my day job.}

What does all this mean?
In two weeks I will drop down to 25-30 hrs/wk.
Someone else will be responsible for the office.

I will have time for my other life.

So exciting.

***folding fabric: sorry - cannot remember where I saw the TUTORIALs on how to fold fabric.
This method works best for your quilting cottons that are 44" wide.
--Fold in half, lengthwise,  wrong sides together.
Fold the short 22" end around your big 6" wide quilter's ruler (don't have one?   ---loser) and start wrapping fabric around the ruler.
Either the raw edges at the end folds to the inside or not. If not, just fold/tuck under so it does.
Slide ruler out.
Fold in half (hamburger fold).

My shelf is 25 or so inches wide. Each stacked fold comes out about 6 1/2" wide.
I decided that three stacks of 'yardage' worked for me with a narrow shoebox-type holder for the 'fat quarters' as the 4th stack.
The width of folding depends on your bookshelf width.

Keep folding.
This doesn't work so well on 60" fabric, or yardage.

19 May, 2013

New Sewing Room

I have too much fabric.

Those boxes filling the closet are filled with Satins, Xmas, Brocades, Pendleton, Wools, Airplanes, Battings, RickRacks, Zippers, Buttons, Patterns.

Although, there is still the cutting table to fill up -- 12 drawers (IKEA kitchen island), the 2 drawers under the window seat, and the bookcase for cotton fabrics on the right hand wall.

The machines are still covered.

It's all going to fit.



I've sent for help.

18 May, 2013

Halibut Beer Bits

Halibut was on sale at Thriftway this week.
I made halibut beer bits.

I'd forgotten how good these are.
Crispy crunchy outside with succulent halibut that melts in your mouth.

Totally not gluten-free or grain-free.

Use Krusteaz pancake batter and add beer until it's tad thinner than pancake batter.
The beer batter thickens to just the right consistency to coat 1" cubes of halibut.

Heat (a high heat) oil until 350'.

I used 48oz in a 3qt saucepan.

Cook one to two beer bits to get temperature stabilized, halibut done, & outside a deep golden brown.

Once temp. is stabilized, fry only three or four cubes at a time to keep temp. of oil constant.

While you're waiting for oil to get hot enough - do not leave unattended --make some homemade cocktail sauce.

1cup ketchup
Swig Worcestershire sauce
Spoonful horseradish sauce
2 jigs of lemon juice.

Stir until blended.

These were delish.

Slightly frozen halibut is easier to slice.
Try to keep oil at 350'. Finesse that temperature knob.
Cut your halibut into uniform pieces. These will cook at similar times.

You can also use Tartar sauce.
Krusteaz only - don't substitute.
However, any beer will work.

11 May, 2013

Dinner Outside

I've hosed down the patio, arranged all the plants, scrubbed the table.

Let the summer begin.

BBQ hamburger with avocado, french fries, watermelon.

SMS Spring Giveaway Winners

Thank you for all the dreams. Sewing people tend to want to sew more - if money were no object.

My three winners:
1. Debra Lee from Needle D won the 4th of July combo - including how to crochet a beer can hat!
Debra Lee's dream? "I would stay home and make dolls all day and attend every retreat around the world! Call me crazy but I want a can hat!"

2.  Diane from Archimede's Bathtub won the Seersucker scraps. She said, " I would move to a beautiful house somewhere tropical."

3. Margaret from Kolorful Scraps won the MopHead Doll Books. Her dream?  "I would travel with my husband all over the United States. I could stop at all the fabric stores on the way "

Congratulations and thank you!
Emails have been sent out- waiting for addresses for a Monday run to the PO.

09 May, 2013

Patio Is Ready For Summer (Almost)

Seven hanging baskets ready to hang. I tend towards wanting the hanging baskets in August & September when I am so tired of watering and  flowers are rather sparse.

There are a lot of vendors selling baskets this time of year that look pretty but are already root-bound. They likely won't bloom much past 4th of July. Mine have lots of rooms now so they can become root-bound in late summer.

More pots to spread around the patio.

It's been a warm spring here in Canbyland. My sister just had snow in MN last week but we are on our third month of an unusually dry spring. Just glorious on the flowers.

Behind all this greenery is the neighbor's house. I'm still working on my living fence but this will cut the "view".

Last February, I scheduled five days off - here in May. I had hoped the floors would be done and my plan was to spend the five days re-organizing the sewing room and  guest room. Alas, I'm on plan B instead. Floor guys will put finish coats on next week!.
Plan B is to get my garden and yard in shape.

Plant the potatoes, try to hold off on the tomatoes. Last week we were still getting below 40' at night. Except the temps have been above 80' during the day so it is incredibly tempting to put everything in the ground 'early'.

Finish weeding and spring clean-up of the flower beds. Move stuff, dump stuff.

Favorite Iris just started popping open.

Coral Bells next to a varigated Weigelia.

May:   this bed has filled in a lot since I took a photo back in early April.
The Kousa Dogwood did not like 80' days and threw off it's lovely coral blossoms

Early April - see all the weed-free space?
The Kousa Dogwood was just pinking up - on the center left.

At my birthday lunch. My Mom & Dad and older sister took me to lunch at my favorite Moroccan Restaurant in Wilsonville, Dar Essalam.
One of the few restaurants where I have several food choices I can eat. The chef will special order for me as well. This is a good restaurant for me and my food sensitivities.

After lunch, my dad wanted to go by AT&T. He was ready to look at smart phones and I was showing him how versatile the camera is.

06 May, 2013

10th Spring SewMamaSew Giveaway Day

Thank you for visiting my giveaway today. I love SewMamaSew's Giveaways even though I don't have enough time in the day to visit all the ones I would love to win.
I enjoy seeing all the other sewing/quilting./knitting/ being crafty blogs that are out there.

I have three prizes for you to win.

Up for grabs are:

1.   4th of July combo.  Including a crocheted budweiser beer hat pattern! This is so retro- it's on trend for this 4th!  Daisy Kingdom 4th of July Table topper, 4th of July Vest (V.I.P. Dream Spinners) to sew and embellish, pattern to re-purpose beer cans/your drink of choice.

2.    Seersucker scraps. Fun whale patterned fabric. Kid themed. Hearts and Whales are the biggest pieces - others are cut squares (quilt?). whales spouting amongst stars, Hearts, tiny 1/4" hearts & stars, blue, peach & pink solids and small florals.

3.   Mop Head Doll Patterns. Six booklets to make all the mop head dolls you will desire.

I sew mostly garments and crafts. Last year I was on a crazy bag/purse making kick which I hope to god is finished so I can move onto something else.   I have a modern quilt pattern for our bed that I would love to make and need just time and the background fabrics to start sewing it. All the 'fussy' fabrics are in my possession.

I have been working the day job over 50 hours per week since September and my sewing has been pitiful indeed.
My junior clerk came back this month for a few weeks enabling me to work only about 40 hrs/wk.
This is better but it's still not working.

At 50hrs/wk I can hardly think of anything else except work and keeping my health up.
At 40 hrs/wk, I started 'dreaming' about sewing again;

My dream - if money and benefits were no object - would be to quit the day job and go whole-hog into running my etsy store and sewing for it.  I would have time for my friends again and the flexibility to mesh with their schedules. I could re-institute my wednesday kindle lunches with my mom. My creativity would soar.

What about you? If money and benefits were no object, what is your dream?
Comment  in a sentence or two and I will pull numbers out of a hat on Friday night and post Saturday, May 11th. Happy dreaming.

Please take the time to thank SewMamaSew for coordinating another (10!   10!   10!) Great Giveaway day. To enter more drawings, please click here.

small print: Open for everyone. USA and all the other countries.
Drawing open from Monday May 6, 2013 - May 10, 2013 at 6pm.
Oh- if you have a prize preference, indicate in your comment.
Three winners!!!

04 May, 2013

Birthday Treats

My Japanese friend surprised me with a package filled with airplane birthday love.

These two fabrics have Oregon written on them along with hundreds of other quilty names.

Janine and I met during a SewMamaSew giveaway day -- online. Turned out she grew up right behind me in Canbyland.

She met her honey while living in Japan. She's been living in Japan for 25 years.

Dot Liner shaped liked a mail delivery van.
No idea what a dot liner does but it's stinkin' Japanese cute in it's packaging.

Sewing charms: Thread, Sewing machine, Stork Scissors, Buttons, Tape Measure, Sewing Basket.

Thank you for the birthday wishes.
ありがとう   ( I hope google translate got this right...)

Speaking of SMS, their Spring Giveaway Day (week) starts Monday.

I will raid my garage - still in midst of installing wood floors - and put together 2 or 3 "prizes".