Neologisms

My brother-in-law sent me this.
Thought I'd share.

Bozone is my favorite.

1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people

 that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, 

unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in
the near future.

Although Arachnoleptic fit is a close second.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed 

just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

Neologisms
The Washington Post has published the winning submissions

 to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked

 to supply alternative meanings for common words.

The winners are:
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight 

you have gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a 

flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), a condition in which you 

absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavoured mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up

 after you are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing 

adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon (n), Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster (n.), person who sprinkles his conversation

 with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The 

belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the 

roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), opening in the front of boxer shorts 
worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers 

to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, 

subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply
a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people 

that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer,

 unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in
the near future.
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for 
the purpose of getting laid.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which rend-

ers the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit

 and the person who doesn't get it.
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are

 running late.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (that one got

 extra credit)
9. Karmageddon (n): Its like, when everybody is sending off
all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth 
explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through
 the day consuming only things that are good for you.
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem 

smarter when they come at you rapidly.
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just 

after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets

 into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
15. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a

 grub in the fruit you're eating.
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid and an a**hole

I See The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Pencil girl gave up hoeing strawberries on Memorial Day to come over and help me focus.

This weekend, I came across a blog post about how to fold fabric***.

REALLY?
Proper ways to fold fabric?

It turns out there are. Multiple ways. Silly ways. Elaborate ways.

This one made practical sense to me: Fold fabric around your 6" wide quilt/cutting ruler. Flip in half. Place on stack.

I think I could keep this up.

( no smirking) .

Eleven drawers are filled.
With sewing notions.
Knitting/crochet hoops and needles and hooks in this drawer.



Amazingly, some boxes came OUT of the closet and were dispersed to better locations.

----With pencil girl cracking the whip.




Still work to do.

I met my new boss on Saturday. First impression was an A+.

This is scary as in, "Is he really this nice?"
Waiting for the shoe to drop....

{I do have some trust issues with my day job.}

What does all this mean?
In two weeks I will drop down to 25-30 hrs/wk.
Someone else will be responsible for the office.

I will have time for my other life.

So exciting.



***folding fabric: sorry - cannot remember where I saw the TUTORIALs on how to fold fabric.
This method works best for your quilting cottons that are 44" wide.
--Fold in half, lengthwise,  wrong sides together.
Fold the short 22" end around your big 6" wide quilter's ruler (don't have one?   ---loser) and start wrapping fabric around the ruler.
Either the raw edges at the end folds to the inside or not. If not, just fold/tuck under so it does.
Slide ruler out.
Fold in half (hamburger fold).

My shelf is 25 or so inches wide. Each stacked fold comes out about 6 1/2" wide.
I decided that three stacks of 'yardage' worked for me with a narrow shoebox-type holder for the 'fat quarters' as the 4th stack.
The width of folding depends on your bookshelf width.

Keep folding.
This doesn't work so well on 60" fabric, or yardage.

New Sewing Room

I have too much fabric.

Those boxes filling the closet are filled with Satins, Xmas, Brocades, Pendleton, Wools, Airplanes, Battings, RickRacks, Zippers, Buttons, Patterns.

Although, there is still the cutting table to fill up -- 12 drawers (IKEA kitchen island), the 2 drawers under the window seat, and the bookcase for cotton fabrics on the right hand wall.

The machines are still covered.

It's all going to fit.

Absolutely.

Really.

I've sent for help.

Halibut Beer Bits

Halibut was on sale at Thriftway this week.
I made halibut beer bits.

I'd forgotten how good these are.
Crispy crunchy outside with succulent halibut that melts in your mouth.

Totally not gluten-free or grain-free.

Use Krusteaz pancake batter and add beer until it's tad thinner than pancake batter.
The beer batter thickens to just the right consistency to coat 1" cubes of halibut.

Heat (a high heat) oil until 350'.

I used 48oz in a 3qt saucepan.



Cook one to two beer bits to get temperature stabilized, halibut done, & outside a deep golden brown.

Once temp. is stabilized, fry only three or four cubes at a time to keep temp. of oil constant.



While you're waiting for oil to get hot enough - do not leave unattended --make some homemade cocktail sauce.

1cup ketchup
Swig Worcestershire sauce
Spoonful horseradish sauce
2 jigs of lemon juice.

Stir until blended.




These were delish.

Hints:
Slightly frozen halibut is easier to slice.
Try to keep oil at 350'. Finesse that temperature knob.
Cut your halibut into uniform pieces. These will cook at similar times.

You can also use Tartar sauce.
Krusteaz only - don't substitute.
However, any beer will work.

Beer Can Hats - Revival

Dinner Outside

I've hosed down the patio, arranged all the plants, scrubbed the table.

Let the summer begin.



BBQ hamburger with avocado, french fries, watermelon.

SMS Spring Giveaway Winners

Thank you for all the dreams. Sewing people tend to want to sew more - if money were no object.

My three winners:
1. Debra Lee from Needle D won the 4th of July combo - including how to crochet a beer can hat!
Debra Lee's dream? "I would stay home and make dolls all day and attend every retreat around the world! Call me crazy but I want a can hat!"

2.  Diane from Archimede's Bathtub won the Seersucker scraps. She said, " I would move to a beautiful house somewhere tropical."

3. Margaret from Kolorful Scraps won the MopHead Doll Books. Her dream?  "I would travel with my husband all over the United States. I could stop at all the fabric stores on the way "

Congratulations and thank you!
Emails have been sent out- waiting for addresses for a Monday run to the PO.